Thursday, June 24, 2010

...but they LIED.

I have recently discovered a new series of anti-drug PSAs. They're from and they all follow the same formula:
1. Kid says "They said taking *insert drug here* would make me *insert adjective here*."
2. Puzzling video montage showing bad things happening to Kid
3. Kid voiceover going "They lied!"
Now, this in itself is just a recipe for cheesiness. To my surprise, a few of them were actually pretty well done. A few. The rest are varying degrees of wtf-inducing bad. I picked out the three worst to share with you.

In third place, we have Bad Trip, or Why E Is Scary:

My main issue with this one is that there is absolutely no reason offered as to why E is bad. It only appears to make you scared or tired or something (I still can't figure out to save my life what the hell is going on in this video) and gives you confusing hallucinations with funky Europop background music. The only actual message offered is that it isn't fun.
Also, I really love the way this girl says "they lied." Go on, just go listen to it again.

In second place we have Sedated Shaun, or Why Painkillers Make You Creepy:

Okay. I have a lot of issues with this video. I'll just go through them in the order they appear here.
Even if you're Abusing painkillers the way this video is talking about, you don't usually take pills in giant handfuls the way this kid does. I mean, holy crap. Also, is it even possible to pop that many without water?
Depressing music FTW.
How the hell does this kid get from place to place, teleporting? I mean, it's implied that he's too sedated to walk or even talk.
For someone that heavily medicated, he plays damn good piano. The rest of the commercial makes you expect him to just faceplant on the keys.
Is it just me, or is the scene with him in front of the curtains really freaking creepy?
Holy soap-opera acting, batman!
I like how when he OD's he conveniently has a whole empty bottle of pills right next to him, even though previously he never took any out of the bathroom. They are leaving nothing to assumption here.
And finally- WHY IS HE RANDOMLY STANDING IN A POOL FULLY CLOTHED? After OD'ing, no less! Why? Why????

And, in first place! The winner is Infinite Insanity, or Why Acid Is... Fun?

I. Love. This. Clip. Is it just me, or does it make acid look really fun? Why couldn't they have broken out the fancy Confusing Hallucination Effects on this PSA instead of the E one? It would actually make sense here.
Note the amount of times he appears wearing stereotypical hippie gear. Fail,, epic fail.
And finally- the rambling. That alone was enough to get this video first place. I LOVE the rambling. If you don't have the patience to keep watching it until you get it all, allow me to take it down-
"There's a separate universe inside each and every one of us. You kill 'em. We're not gonna kill 'em. Reality is the prison of the mind, and when we die, black holes of our mind open up, and we're forced through the gates to infinite insanity."
Yeaaaah, man. Is it really only acid that can make you have this kind of deep funky thoughts? I thought pretty much any type of psychoactive drug would. Either way, it's great.

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